To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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