Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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