We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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