i just made my gag reflex go away.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
