Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Someone came in the potted fern
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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