I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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