If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
