so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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