There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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