I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
