i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
