apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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