yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
