Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
