Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
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