Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
