so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
