I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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