You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize