Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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