There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize