Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Randomize
