just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
