i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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