Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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