I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
