woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
