Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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