i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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