just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
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