would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Randomize
