i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
