that's an acceptable place to lick
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
