we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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