i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
