before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
