we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
i drank out of a bidet.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
God, I missed his penis.
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