I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Randomize