I can feel you judging me through the phone.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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