Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
