i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
