You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
