Define "chronic" masturbator.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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