As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
