she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I won't apologize to a one balled man
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Randomize