is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
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