I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
