i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
