Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize