I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
